Maggie Davis is a teacher and media specialist at Grovetown High School, who wished to be a part of Quoth the Raven. This is a special story she shared on a blog.
I don't remember how the topic came up today, but my children began discussing heaven in the car as we were driving home from school. According to Michael, only 3 people are actually in heaven, Jesus, my mother and Martin (as in Luther King, Jr.). The kids debated today as to what heaven really looks like, where it is, and how you enter. Are there steps leading to the gates, or does one just float there?
Questions that I just don't know how to answer.
Since Michael brought up my mother, it only seemed fitting to talk about her. The kids already knew that she was really sick and died when we were young, but they never knew details. And they still don't know all details. But on the way home today, they asked me when was the last time I saw her.
It was Sept. 5, 1993.
Mom arrived home from the hospital and seemed to be comfortable in her "own" bed. Rich and I planned a double date that night to take my mind off things. Before we were to leave, Dad called...
Your mother wants to see you tonight....
We knew that we needed to get over there soon. And we did...
I was able to talk to her, although I really don't know if she understood what I was saying.
Mom, are you scared???
I will miss you, mom...
I did not get much response from her. Although she did call me Maggles that night....
My biggest regret is that I still went on my date. How could I have left her? How could I not have known that I would have my very last conversation with her?
My 9 year old asked me the same question today in the car.
Why didn't you cancel your date, Mom?
Why is it that my son gets it, but I didn't get it that night?
I went through all of it with my kids this evening. How I will remember the way Aunt Emily said these 2 words for the rest of my life.
Mom died...
How I woke up Aunt Jenny and drove to the house at 4:00 am.
How quiet mom's room was without any machines running.
How we waited for Uncle Gary to drive home from Georgia Tech, and how I watched the men from the funeral home come and get my mother.
Before I knew it, Jack and Mary had tears streaming down their faces. My intention wasn't to make them cry, but to share with them a small piece of my life. A piece of my past that, at times, is still painful to discuss.
You would think after all these years the pain would go away. I am not sure the pain ever goes away, but I know myself well enough now that I can deal with the loss.
And I still feel a loss....
One of the greatest lessons I have learned is that I am very aware of just how much my mother loved me. Having children of my own has shown me that the love my mom had for her children is a love like no other. The gift of my children is a gift from God....pure and simple.....
Jack told me how sad he was that his grandmother never got to know him.
But she does know you, Jack. She knew you before you were ever born. She held you before you ever made it to my arms....
Questions that I just don't know how to answer.
Since Michael brought up my mother, it only seemed fitting to talk about her. The kids already knew that she was really sick and died when we were young, but they never knew details. And they still don't know all details. But on the way home today, they asked me when was the last time I saw her.
It was Sept. 5, 1993.
Mom arrived home from the hospital and seemed to be comfortable in her "own" bed. Rich and I planned a double date that night to take my mind off things. Before we were to leave, Dad called...
Your mother wants to see you tonight....
We knew that we needed to get over there soon. And we did...
I was able to talk to her, although I really don't know if she understood what I was saying.
Mom, are you scared???
I will miss you, mom...
I did not get much response from her. Although she did call me Maggles that night....
My biggest regret is that I still went on my date. How could I have left her? How could I not have known that I would have my very last conversation with her?
My 9 year old asked me the same question today in the car.
Why didn't you cancel your date, Mom?
Why is it that my son gets it, but I didn't get it that night?
I went through all of it with my kids this evening. How I will remember the way Aunt Emily said these 2 words for the rest of my life.
Mom died...
How I woke up Aunt Jenny and drove to the house at 4:00 am.
How quiet mom's room was without any machines running.
How we waited for Uncle Gary to drive home from Georgia Tech, and how I watched the men from the funeral home come and get my mother.
Before I knew it, Jack and Mary had tears streaming down their faces. My intention wasn't to make them cry, but to share with them a small piece of my life. A piece of my past that, at times, is still painful to discuss.
You would think after all these years the pain would go away. I am not sure the pain ever goes away, but I know myself well enough now that I can deal with the loss.
And I still feel a loss....
One of the greatest lessons I have learned is that I am very aware of just how much my mother loved me. Having children of my own has shown me that the love my mom had for her children is a love like no other. The gift of my children is a gift from God....pure and simple.....
Jack told me how sad he was that his grandmother never got to know him.
But she does know you, Jack. She knew you before you were ever born. She held you before you ever made it to my arms....